A New Day

I am finding it difficult to put into words the way I'm feeling today. Joyous, of course, but not only.

Barack Obama is taking office at a time at once more complicated, frightening, and hopeful than any in my politically- and socially-sentient lifetime. The promise of the future is tempered by the trials of the present and, both globally and personally, the tragedies of the recent past.

While Cathy and I watched the inauguration together, we were both giddy with the excitement at this wondrous event taking place in our nation's capitol and melancholy with the knowledge that, for us, the dawning of the Obama Era does not hold all the hope and promise that it did some months ago before our baby Eleanor left us.

I think the sadness magnifies the happiness, if that makes sense. I feel acutely every nuance of what Obama says about the future. I choke up at the most mundane and routine things, not to mention at discourse on the enormity of the first black president taking office. I look forward to the future with great hope and optimism, though those feelings will always be tinged by sadness and loss.

The only thing better than watching Obama take office would have been to watch it with my wife and soon-to-be-born daughter. As it is, I watched with my wife, looking forward to a time when we will again be expecting to start a family. Among all the calls to service, to sacrifice, to citizens to do our part and make this country a better place, I cannot help but feel that my own promise has been somewhat diminished. But I am also more determined than ever to make this place--this country, this world, my own home and family and life in Idaho--a better one, filled with joy and prosperity and a spirit of community and the promise of a brighter future.